Everyone's family and life situation is different. But it still makes me wonder if my thoughts are like that of other moms in my similar situation. Right now my life is pretty consumed with my kids, especially having a newborn. I'm with them during the day, then take care of them at night so my husband can study, or now, go play sand volleyball. I love being a mom! But I feel I have lost the role of wife completely.
I frequently have the song "By Your Side" by Tenth Avenue North playing in my head. I think I want Bryan to be by my side so much (and not just literally). I miss being his wife. I don't feel like I'm loved the way I want to be. I have pretty much no communication with him. Life is too consuming. But when I listen to this song, it reminds me that I don't need to feel this way. Jesus is by my side. I don't need to look for love anywhere else. If I'm not getting it from my husband, Jesus is there to love me. In the dead of the night, when I am falling, I can call out to the Lord. He'll be there. He has always been there, and will continue.
New moms, moms of young children: Am I alone in these thoughts? If I am, help me out. The things I want are simple. And I have shared these with my husband...with no success in change of thought or feeling.
I will continue to listen to TAN and take comfort that the Lord is by my side!
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