And the Oscar goes to...

Brandi Voracek

for the lead role in a B & B Voracek film.

I want to thank everyone who has taken time to help me out in my greatest role ever;
Motherhood!

To Carole Reindl - Thank you for showing me love so many years ago through so many difficult times. Thanks for instilling a love for teaching back in 3rd grade. You played so much of an impact in my life that I even named my daughter after your daughter!

To Coach Page (may you rest in peace) - Thank you for teaching me to truly love something; softball! Having that love in my life to call my own gives me a short break from my greatest role ever!

To my Grandma and Grandpa K. (miss you Grandpa) - Thank you for showing me that marriage is a promise worth keeping! Thank you for showing me unconditional love while I take time to pursue my lead role!

To Sandy and Diane C. - Thank you to both of you for taking over for me in my professional career of kids so I can focus on my lead role as a MOM!

To Jocelyn - Thank you for putting faith back into my heart. Thank you for allowing me to feel important. Thank you for the encouragement you've given me while I focus on my lead role!

To George and Eileen - Thank you doesn't even cover all the support and love you've had for me. You've helped me throughout my ups and downs while I've been learning my lines and spots for this role. You've both been there when I've needed you.

To Dad - Thank you for influencing the choices I make as a parent! And thank you for being a listening ear during some of my ups and downs while I took this lead role as MOM! Even if you haven't always agreed with my choices, you've always been supportive.

To Beth - Thank you for being my "Go-To Girl"! You are my sister in Christ, and I cherish our friendship more than words can describe! Thank you for being my cheerleader, my prayer partner, my mentor, my counselor and most importantly my best friend!

To my kids - You inspire me EVERY. SINGLE. DAY! I love you more than anything in this world. I hope you always feel this love, even as I guide you throughout many choices. It's because of you that I won this lead role! Thank you for making my life have so much more meaning!

To my husband - You are my rock. My partner. My best friend. My love. You have been so supportive and patient through so many rocky roads. You have always been there for me, from the moment I took on this lead role. I can't say enough how much I love you. Thank you for helping me become a better person every day. I could not have gotten this far without you! I love you!

To God - Thank you for continuing to bless me in spite all of my imperfections. You have carried me through some pretty dark times throughout my role of MOM. And you have brought the sunshine out when I just needed some light. You have never given up on me, even when I've questioned where you were taking me. And you've given me strength when I thought I had none. Thank you, Lord, for being my shepherd.

What's the point of fasting?

This was a question that I really never understood until yesterday. Every time Lent came around I would always ask my husband, who is Catholic (I'm Lutheran), why he fasted. Why he didn't eat meat on Fridays. Part of the answer was because he's Catholic, and that's what they do.

That wasn't good enough for me. There should be a reason, in my opinion.

Then it was because it's a sacrifice! Jesus made a sacrifice for us, and it's a small sacrifice to say thanks for the sacrifice Jesus made for us. But it still didn't resonate in my heart. I make sacrifices every day, especially since having kids! But I still didn't get it.

Until yesterday.

I have been following the journey of this little girl and her family. And it is truly heartbreaking. Yesterday, Kate's mom had asked for people to fast and continue to pray. So I thought, sure, that's something I can do from so many miles away. So I don't eat for a day. Easy enough. It's one day. There are many people who don't eat for days at a time.

Yeah, whole new meaning of fasting. I am a proponent of eating breakfast; the most important meal of the day. So I figured that would be the hardest part for me. It was tough. I enjoy my bowl of frosted mini spooners and my glass of OJ! But throughout that time, while my belly was asking me what in the world I was doing, I prayed!

I prayed that God would take the pain away from this family. That God would heal Kate.

It was amazing how many times throughout the day I thought about food. And how many times it sunk in that every time I thought about food, I was praying for this little girl and her family.

All. Day. Long.

It then hit me why people truly fast. It was a sacrifice. But more than that, it was a reflection time; many throughout the day. A time to stop and have a chat with God. A time to ask for help for a little girl who is traveling throughout a tough journey. A time to think of someone other than myself.


Here's some information on fasting and abstaining, in case any of you are interested in learning.

Can't Hang on AND Let Go

I've been breastfeeding for 10 months this stretch. And this is kid #4! So you can imagine my desire to be done and have my body back! (My husband thinks it's about time, too! Although he supports me completely!) I'm ready to let go of this baby stage in another 2 months.

But at the same time, I'm sad. I want to hang on to those moments. The moments when Peanut lifts her little, chubby, precious hand to my mouth for me to kiss. The moments when she falls asleep in the nook of my elbow, knowing she feels safe with her Momma. The moments when I can stroke her hair that is just long enough now to tuck behind her ears. The moments when I can get lost in the beauty of being a mom. The moments when I can be selfish knowing I'm the only one who can feed her in this way. The moments when I can be selfish and have her all to myself.

Babies grow up. And some/many parents can't wait for their kiddos to grow up. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited for the time when I don't have to change any more diapers. Or when I don't have to carry around a diaper bag full of sippy cups and puffs. But I want to hang on to these moments for as long as I can. They disappear in the blink of an eye.

I see my 7-year-old, who'll be turning 8 in a month. I used to hold him the same way I hold Peanut. That's impossible now. I see my strong and confident little lady who just turned 6. I struggled with her during her first year. But I'll never have that year back. And now my Little Man, who just turned 3. I've been home with him since he was three months old! And although those were three long years with A LOT going on, they went so fast. Now my baby, my Peanut, will turn 1 in less than two months!

I am just realizing that as much as I want to let go, to get my body and independence back, I am also hanging on to every last drop I can of this sunshine.

But I can't hang on AND let go.